Better off alone

It's funny, being asked if you ever felt like nothing mattered, that no one cares about you. It's funny because I feel like that on a daily basis yet I do my best to provide legit advice.

It's funny how people lecture you about not trusting others but they're usually the same people ready to hop up and leave.

It's funny how no matter how much I try to be a good friend I always get screwed in the end.

Sitting here, I shouldn't be as hurt as I am. I should be used to this by now. I'll never be good enough for anyone. No matter how many times I try to be better, it's never enough for anyone.

So tell me, what reason do I have to keep trying? The days go back and forth rather to stay here or not. Somedays I'm great, and somedays the world's ending. What do you do when no matter what you try, it's still not good enough for anyone around?

Old friends

It hurts when the people you hold closest to you don't see you the same way. It seems like anytime I try to continue a friendship along, something ends up happening. Am I just unlikeable? Am I too much for even a normal friendship to handle?

You know, even when you do everything you're supposed to do it's still not good enough. Going to therapy once a week, keeping a journal, getting on medication, practicing every day etc. It's all never good enough. I really miss having people close to me I can talk to.

A couple of days ago, I had a friend I really held close to my heart say we're not friends anymore. I can appreciate the honesty. I appreciate someone letting me know where we stand versus just up and disappearing. However, I'm very disappointed. It's incredibly hard for me to make new friends. Losing all of the ones I love really makes it hard. I refuse to stay where I'm not wanted. If you don't want me around? That's fine. I'd rather people be honest. The only thing I can do is with them the best of luck in their life and hope that it becomes a better one.

Disappointing hard to swallow pills

Just because you care about someone, doesn't mean they care about you.

Just because you call someone your best friend, doesn't mean they do the same for you.

Just because you put people high on your priority list, doesn't mean they do rh same for you.

Just because you have patience with people, doesn't mean they will be patient with you.

Just because you're willing to try to understand what they're going through, doesn't mean they will appreciate your efforts.

Just because someone crosses your mind, doesn't mean you cross theirs.

Just because you want someone In  your present, doesn't mean they want you in theirs.

Just because you haven't moved on from the friendship, doesn't mean they haven't moved on from you.

Just because you'd like to think of them as friends as an adult, doesn't mean you're not just that "childhood" friend to them.