Numb

My depression has gotten to the point of just a numbing contentment. I feel down but can't put the full reason into words.
All I want to do is just sleep and not wake up again. This life terrifies me.

I try to wake up every day telling myself I can do this. The truth is im not sure anymore. Regular daily errands are hard for me. Talking on the phone shouldn't be hard for me, but it is. My anxiety makes simple tasks difficult. I've tried getting help and tried it in my own. I miss my old therapist so much. She was always so easy to talk too. I have an appointment for another therapist soon but man it's hard to wait..

People want to help but don't know how. I don't know how anyone can help other than just simply being there for me. I wish I had a better answer but I don't. I wish I didn't feel this way. I wish my moods wouldn't act this crazy.. I just wish I felt okay again.